Saturday, December 31, 2011

Nanepashemet Peep of the Year for 2012.

So this is the time that you have so impatiently waited for all year.  Ever since Tommy O' Shea achieved the ultimate honor/disgrace.... the Nanepashemet Peep of the Year for 2011.... speculation has been rampant as to who will succeed him in 2012.
~
But first a word about Tommy O.
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His reign was regal as his career soared at that foreign corporation that he works for, and he served as an anchor for his long suffering wife, Linda.  And it all capped off with the highly successful launch of the TommyO  Fashion Line  in the Nanepashemet Blogging Apparel Store.  Both the TommyO Tank Top and the   TommyO Taking Out the Trash Bathrobe were killer sales items that had the Indonesians working overtime and bitching constantly in their cheap labor production sweatshop.
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So Tommy will be a hard act to follow.
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Course all of the former POTY's served with distinction as their lives were transformed for better or worse during their dubious POTY reigns.
  • Tom McMahon ~ 2007
  • Lauren Rathbone ~ 2008
  • Michael "Murph" Murphy ~ 2009
  • Jeremy Johnson  ~ 2010
  • Tommy O'Shea  ~ 2011
And now the mantle must shift to another individual, who undoubtedly will be testament at this time next year to the almost metaphysical transformation that the Nanepashemet Peep of the Year title conveys.
~
So without any further a do do.....

ANNOUNCING.....
Nanepashemet Peep of the Year for the Year 2012.

Kerry Russell D'Orio.

As you know, it would be taboo to disclose the reason for this solemn selection, and I dare not even approach the topic given the effect that it could have on the balance of the Universe.
~
So don't be sending me any "Why, Why" incantations.  The deed is done and is forever scribed into the firmament.
~
OK???? So that's it.  All done.  Hang in there Kerry.   It will be a roller coaster year for you.

Kerry Russell D'Orio said...

OMG! After a day of ripping it up on the bunny slope like Linday Vaughn and celebrating my daughters 8 th birthday I have found out that I am peep of the F'n year!! I can guarantee that I have been annoying and fun. Tommy O ( cue orgasm voice) is a classic. I have some big shoes to fill. I will order me up a plush Tommy O bathrobe and write my acceptance speech. Happy New Year!

Kerry Russell D'Orio

TommyO said......   Jan 12, 2012 01:45 PM

Wow, Twice now I have tried to send along my "outgoing" POTY post and both times, lost it or failed. I am going to tell you this right now. During my run as POTY, this never happened.  
This just goes to prove the Power of the POTY Title. I had a tremendous year. Work has been outstanding, could be the best sales numbers in my career. My SWISS based Logistics Company posted excellent results and is very healthy, My family is also healthy and looking good. I have had great times with great friends and hope to continue to do so. 
The POTY title is not just a title for one year. This honor gives one the inner confidence to do the right thing and brings out the best in a person. The POTY is not just a title given by a MOAM, it is a state of mind. That is why this attempt will be posted accordingly. Kerry, you are well deserving and all my best going forward. You can feel it right?
Thanks Jay for bestowing upon me this tremendous gift.
TommyO

2012 New Year's Resolutions

Peeps -
So many of you have been pestering me about my New Year's resolutions. Not sure why... resolutions are highly personal, and the reolutions of a Mountain of a Man are normally unattainable by ordinary Peeps like yourselves.
~
But I know you.... you will fret, worry, and get really neurotic until you see what the MOAM has in store for the New Year.  So, regardless or how irritating it is, I will comply with your pathetic request and let you in on what I have resolved for 2012.
~
This year, my resolutions are about developing habits, not necessarily acheiving goals.
  • Get a burn in every morning, on the Cybex, Treadmill or a Harbor Row.
  • Practice Banjo and Guitar every night (after Joanne goes to bed)
  • Learn CAD and practice it every night (between banjo practice).
  • Process Mail and paperwork daily.
  • Archive Files and purge daily.
  • Eat sensibly and deny urge to eat carbs.
So if I develop these habits, the results should be that my weight trends downward, I become a closet musician, can design projects on the computer, and my office is neat and organized. 
~
And BTW....phuck the Mayans..... They can take their sophisticated calendar calling for the end of the world and stick it up their extinct asses.  I don't plan on cashing it in this year.
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I agree that it sounds pretty boring... but it's my life, not your's.  Get your own Goddamn Resolutions.

Thursday, December 29, 2011

Customer Appreciation

We got these cool on-the-rocks whiskey glasses to hand out as customer appreciation gifts to Nanepashemet Telecom customers and vendors.  They are clear heavy glass with "Nanepashemet" laser etched on them.  Even Joanne thinks they are really classy.
~
It's not required that you drink Lagavulin in them, but highly recommended.
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If your think that you can't live without one, drop me an email, and we'll see if we can save one or two for you.

Anonymous said...
Obviously drinking whiskey out of the glasses.
What's a Cutomer?
_________________________________________
Normally I Don't publish anonymous comments, but this guy was correct on the whiskey and correct on the mis-spelling.
J.

Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Fried Laptop

Somebody dropped some liquid on my laptop at Christmas and it's fried now.  The theory expressed by my kids is that it is my own fault for leaving it on the end table when the elderly are around.  If I agreed with this, I'd be filled with self-loathing, but I'm basically just pissed.
~
I wanted to replace it with a Mac, but I have my Dell account that I paid off earlier this year, so I fired it up for a cheap Dell laptop that should be here next week or so.  In the meanwhile, I'll try to see if I can salvage some files from the dead laptop.
~
BTW, it would be interesting to hear their theory if it was their computer that was doused.

Sunday, December 25, 2011

POTW Week 51

Time flies when you're having fun.  I can't believe we are heading into the last week of the year.  Serious Nanepashemet Peeps realize the gravity of this period. 
~
For Tommy O, who received the thoughtful gift of a "Tommy O Take Out the Trash Bathrobe" from his beautiful wife Linda, and daughters Kelsy and Kate this Christmas morning, the coming week is especially eventful.
~
This is Tommy's last week as the 2011 Peep of the Year.
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By most accounts, it has been a banner year for the POTY.
~
This comes as no surprize.   You will recall that last year's POTY, Jeremy Johnson became a partner in the Minnesota powerhouse lawfirm of Grey, Plant, Mooty.   Tommy O's career has also taken an appropriate boost at the German/Swiss whatever Logistics firm where he works.  I hope the momentum of this year carries over.
~
Soon, the magic and mystique of the Nanepashemet Peep of the Year mantle will be passed to another deserving POTY wannabee.
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Who will it be???? and why???
Please don't ask these annoying questions which can never be answered.
~
In the meanwhile, we have this week's  POTW's to honor/disparage.

ANNOUNCING....
Nanepashemet Peeps of the Week for the 51st Week of 2011.

Jill Phillips
Nathaniel Clarke
Peter Lojko
Doug Maxfield
Tim Mcguire
Al Watts

Tension is in the air for next week's selection.

Tuna Lips said...
Yer boy looks like that there kungfu panda in the kiddie shows. I like cut of his jib, may have te git me one of them samurai robes yer peddlin' for karaoke night at the Rte 44 Benny Hanna. I does a mean Engleburt Humperdink, "After the Lovins". That robe would handle the DNA splatter

Saturday, December 24, 2011

Christmas Wish

It's Christmas Eve.
~
A time of many happy memories of family and friends.  To me, the classic Christmas movie is the 1989 "National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation" because so many of us can identify in our own way with the emotions and frustrations that Chevy Chase portrays.
~
Looking back at the stages of my life, it's readily apparent that we have had bountiful blessings.  Some have been bestowed by our own hard work, and some seem to come from the benevolence of a guiding spirit.  Some of our blessings have material manifestations, but the real blessings are the love and friendship that come from family, friends, and even you pathetic Nanepashemet Peeps.
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I feel blessed to have run into you during this brief wander on planet Earth.
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My wish to you on this Christmas Eve is that you take strong notice of the bounteous blessings that rain upon you each and every day amid our daily trials.
~
Merry Christmas Peeps.

Maria Rowen said...

And for the most fortunate, it is the bountiful blessing of brandy in the breakfast egg nog... I too feel blessed to have wandered into your planet this morning... Thanks for another year...

Thursday, December 22, 2011

Tidings and Joy

Seems to be a lot of angst out there about Christmas celebrations.
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Why can't we all just get along?
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Christmas might have started as a religious holiday, but now it has evolved into a wholly secular celebration of   "Peace on Earth, Goodwill Toward Men".
~
Santa has nothing to do with Jesus... nor do pine trees in our house, pagan wreathes, and decorating our homes with electric light bulbs.
~
If you want Jesus out, it's already been done. But let's keep Santa. He transcends the religious dogma.  And we really should try to keep all of that "Joy" stuff.    How can that hurt anybody?
~
If you want to add Jesus back in (as I do), that's a personal decision.
~
Seasons Greetings.

Blog to Go

Just got an urgent message from a Peep requesting  a mobile phone app to access the Nanepashemet Blog. 
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It's a fair request.   I'm not the least bit insulted by it.
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In fact, such a app already exists.
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If you want to view the blog on your smartphone, point the phone browser to
 www.nanepashemet.blogspot.com/?m=1
~
Please enjoy your blog fix responsibly.

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Bye Bye Kim

Do you buy the news shots of the hysterically crying North Koreans mourning the death of their beloved dictator, Kim Jong il ?
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Seems slightly staged doesn't it?   Like we'll imprison your grandmother if you don't obnoxiously wail  publically.
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Really sad.

mjnest48 said...

Oh Herro

Tuna Lips said...
Looks like the reactin' that gos on when I crop-dust the Keno crowd with a "pickled egg and pork rinds" silent but deadly special. The humanity.






Tuesday, December 20, 2011

East Bumphuck

Those of you who think that the Mountain of a Man always gets what he wants at a zoning hearing three freaking driving hours from his house would be freaking wrong.  The worse requests are the simple ones.  The kind Board members are inclined to grant the permit, but would we mind just setting up a site viewing and coming back to see them next year or so?
~
Of course we don't freaking mind.  It is our phucking pleasure to drive to East BumPhuck and come to a whole other freaking hearing a month from now so we can achieve what could have happened easily last night.
~
Happy to do it.

Sunday, December 18, 2011

Brady v. Tebow


I'm patiently waiting for the Patriots - Broncos game this Sunday afternoon.  Should be a good game.  Both quarterbacks are hot.... the experienced Brady and the unlikely Tebow.  The press has been touting this as Tom Brady, the Secular Man of the World, versus Tim Tebow, the Fundamentalist Christian Clean Living Icon.
~
I'm sure that it is not a confrontation of good and evil.  Just because Brady swears on the sidelines and has sex with movie stars and supermodels.... that doesn't make him a bad guy.  And  Tebow, steeped in thanks and prayer living at home with his mom, doesn't make him particularly virtuous.
~
I have nothing against either quarterback.   But I think I'm leaning towards Brady.

Jim L. said... 
I find the fact that the Mountain of a Man describes a couple of guys as "hot" just a little disturbing.



Saturday, December 17, 2011

Tazed by a Furniture Ad

I'm sure she's a nice person, and this comment isn't going to seem very Christmas spirit like, but I just have to say this.
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The shrill voice every morning of Bermie and Phyl's slightly rotund daughter on their TV furniture commercials hits my nerves like a freaking Tazer.
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"Get zero percent financing at Bernie and Phyl's!"
~
Don't Taze me Bitch... Don't TAZE ME!
~
Otherwise... Happy Holdiays.

Friday, December 16, 2011

Waiting to Kick Back

Sorry for the gap in posts.  I was back and forth to Connecticut for the past three days and the drive time is tedious.
~
It's not like a bunch of blogable stuff didn't happen.... like finding out where about ten thousand crows roost at twilight in Hartford (on the trees surrounding the cell site that we were working on.   It was like an Alfred Hitchcock movie.)
~
And we've been combining cell site construction with zoning meeting work in the evening, which has contributed to the hours being freaking crazy.  Although I like to write and don't feel too much effort in doing it (which probably shows in the content), it is still hard to summon up the strength when you are dead tired.
~
One more trip to New Haven County next week, and I'll kick back for the Christmas Holiday.  But only after a bunch of customer care holiday events.   MOAM... don't fail me now.

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

New Toy

Bought a tool to bend PVC pipe today at http://www.pvcbendit.com/.  We'll use it to bend some PVC at a cell site that Nanepashemet Telecom is building..... but then I have a lot of other stuff in mind.  Like some wild outdoor furniture, or some complicated plumbing for the Japanese water garden that I'm planning, or some resilient bumpers for the Marblehead Gunning Dory.
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Any tool with it's capabilities tends to widen your mind with its possibilities.  This one, which allows a resilient, rigid, material like PVC pipe to be transforimed into highly manipulated curves, is going to be a boon for all sorts of imagination.
~
I'm wicked psyched.

Tuna Lips said...

I was wonderin' who was gonna snap up the late Missus Hornstroffer's 2-in-1 vacuum hose and dildo with vibratin' action. You can tell a lot about someone from a yard sale. I reckon it'd suprise nobody that peoples far and wide knowed her fer keepin' a very tidy home.

dougmaxfield said...

I would love a report on how this tool works. Could be quite useful for changing my buoy system that I currently am not so impressed with.
_________________________________________________________

And you shall have your report, Waterman.
The system basically turns 1 1/4" PVC pipe into plyable spaghetti for a period of time when you can easily place it into any form.  After that, it cools to its original rigidity.  Check out the videos on the website.

Feel free to give me a call if you want a personal demonstration.




Skull Caps and Slumber

Gail Johnson was over the house yesterday when a shipment of Tuna :Lips Skull Caps was delivered.  I could tell by her facial expression that she intensely desired to own the high quality knit garment so I gave her one and another for her slightly schizo spouse Dale/Buck.
~
Once that was done, we were emotionally free to have an enjoyable dinner, after which I retired to the bedroom, strapped on my sleep apnea apparatus, and had a long and restful December night slumber.
~
I know it's not a particularly interesting or insightful vignette, but it's all I have for now.

Sunday, December 11, 2011

Cousin Eddie

Someone hacked into my Amazon.com account and placed the CLARK GRISWOLD Christmas Vacation Chicago Blackhawks CCM White Hockey Jersey in  my checkout cart.
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Who would do such a thing????
~

I can think of a couple of people.
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If it wasn't such a high quality item, I'd be really pissed.
~
At any rate, if you are the Cousin Eddie who did this... I would watch your back.

Saturday, December 10, 2011

Order Madness

So I'm at the Duluth Trading Co. site ordering some shoes and they say that my size has sold out.  A nice lady even called me on my cell phone to tell me that they couldn't fulfill my order, and she gave me a code for free shipping on my next order.  Excellent customer care.
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But, as cool as they are at Duluth, you won't find that problem at the Nanepashemet Blogging Apparel Store.  All of our advertised stock is readily available so you won't experience the bitter dissapointment of order rejection. 
~

Even though the Tuna Lips Skull Caps are flying out the door, there will be one ready for you when you finally get up the gonads to fire up your plastic. 
~
Despite massive orders from 50 states as well as Canadian Provinces, the Tommy O Tank Tops are fully stocked for your muscle shirt enjoyment.
~

And the Atty Jeremy Johnson Wannabee Boxers in all sizes are ready for order.... although there has been a big run on the 2X's.
Some of you Peeps have accused the Mountain of the Man of selling this stuff in a shameless effort to raise some extra Holiday scratch.  Very insightful.  But that's not the only freaking reason.   The fact is that all of the profits from this enterprize will be donated to my favorite charity... the JJ Fund... dedicated to keeping the Mountain of a Man as solvent as possible.
~
And before you click to another site in disgust, consider this ..... if the JJ Fund isn't sizably healthy.... how do you expect to get your pathetic Nanepashemet Blog fix.... day after hopeless day????  Yeah.. You didn't think of that, did you?

Friday, December 09, 2011

Small Town

Living in a small town used to mean that you dealt with gossip and people who wanted to know everything about you.
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But the information age now means that the entire world is really a small town for purposes of finding out anything about anyone.
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That's why the news seems to be so prone to gossip about celebrities and low life situations.
~
Gossip seems to help people let go of the absurdities and incompetence in their own lives as they search for the failings in others.  Now we don't have to hang in the village square to find our topics.  They are brought to us electronically from the four corners of the Earth.

Pisc said...

My tuna lips winter cap arrived today. Perfect



Thursday, December 08, 2011

Crap Shoot

My friend, Will Murray, called yesterday and asked that I attend a zoning hearing at the City of Peabody this evening.
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Naturally I'll be there.  Will seemed pretty worked up about it. 
~
A big part of my livelyhood is getting permits from various municipalities.  And there is always a lot of anxiety around it, because people you don't know  can really drop a monkey wrench in your path.  But things generally work out the way they're supposed to. 
~
My company has gotten over a hundred permits in the last two years.   And I have been skunked badly once in that time in a little Berkshire hill town... didn't see it coming at all.
~
This one tonight is not business for me... I'm just there to support a friend.  Betting that he beats the odds.

Wednesday, December 07, 2011

Couch Visualization

Today will be a long day.
~
Sometime late tonight or in the early hours of tomorrow, I will be sitting here on the couch after traveling to New Haven County this evening for a zoning hearing and then deadheading back to Marblehead.
~
I anticipate a positive outcome, but you never know.  I've been submarined at these events before.  If I get the petition approved, it will be worth it.

UPDATE
I'm back on the couch as predicted at 12:06AM.  Our petition was accepted unanimously, which was nice... but the six hours or so in the F150,..... down to New Haven and back...was  freaking exhausting.  Living the Dream has its limitations.

Birthday Bonus

It was my birthday yesterday... which I share with my grandson, Ethan, who was born on the same day of the year.  This guarantees that my family will always remember my birthday, because they are too scared to forget Ethan's.  If you saw the pic that I posted yesterday, you would know why.
~
Sometimes, being a Mountain of a Man means that you have to step back and quell  personal excitement for the sake of others.  So I was pretty low key about my day.  But Joanne and I did go down to our favorite Marblehead restaurant, Cafe Italia, with Dale and Gail Johnson and the Johnson's picked up the tab.
~
That took the sting out of the wait staff calling me "Big Guy".
~
I continue to harbor the theory that calling people "Big Guy" is a euphemism for "Fat Shit".   So Dale never misses the chance to tab the "BG" moniker on me.
~
Did I mention that he picked up the tab?  Let him have his fun.....

Monday, December 05, 2011

Should Have Seen the Other Guy

This is a photo of my Grandson, Ethan Nestor, who ran into some trouble down at the local YMCA.
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Here he is patiently waiting with his balloon for Santa.
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If I were Santa... I'd give him what he asks for.
~
He turns 3 years old tomorrow.

Sunday, December 04, 2011

A Shame about Cain

It's not like Herman Cain was going to get the Nanepashemet Nod, but I have a real bad taste in my mouth about him leaving the Republican nomination race and the way he had to leave.
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It seems to me that he didn't force himself on any of the women who came forward about him, and I don't see the motivation to throw yourself into the national limelight just because someone made a pass at you..
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Unless of course it was money.
~
I believe that the truth will come out that these women were scamers or corrupted by bribes.
~
A conservative Black Republican candidate is so dangerous to Obama and the Dems, that Cain had to be derailed at all costs.
~
I wonder how much it actually did cost?

Postgame Belichick

Just finished watching Bill Belichick's Post Game press conference as the Pats beat the Colts 31-24.
~
His answers are always the same...
  • Individual stats don't matter.
  • They did some things well and need to improve on other things.
  • They are only interested in focusing on the next team that they are going to play.
~
Basically... it's a team game and keep your focus on the next game.  In many ways, it is a prescription for success in almost any field of endeavor.
~
It seems like he's always in a big hurry to get off of the podium.

~
I do feel bad for the new reporters who throw themselves into the breach once more to ask questions that have been answered the same way for weeks and years on end.

Friday, December 02, 2011

Christmas Shopping Salvation

OK Peeps.
~
In a magnanimous effort help you with your pathetic attempts at Christmas shopping.... I'm going to make it easy for you.... plus, these are the classiest gifts this side of the Pecos.

Tommy McMahon Commemorative Peep of the Year UniSex V Neck T - a steal at $21.90.
Official Nanepashemet Atty Jeremy Johnson Y front Wannabee Boxers - only $17.74.
Official Nanepashemet Tommy O Taking Out the Trash Bathrobe - unheard of price of $39.88.
Official Nanepashemet Mountain of a Man Couch Potato Pants - giving them away at $28.90.
Official Nanepashemet Tuna Lips Skull Cap  - underpriced at $18.90.

Just click on the links and order to your hearts content.
~
Since most of the guys at the Indonesian sweat shop that manufactures these fine garments are Muslims, there is no slowdown during the holiday season.  So production is kicking along like a MoFo.
~
There is a lot of other cool stuff in the store also.

John Forbes Kerry said...

Where can I gut me a Tuna lips Skullcap?

______________________________________________
You would certainly stike a figure on your Rhode Island yacht with the TL logo stuck on your forehead, Senator.   Have your people contact me and I will cut a bulk deal for you, Heinzy, and the rest of your crew.

Thursday, December 01, 2011

500 Point Blessing.

The Dow Jones Stock Market Average rose by 500 points yesterday.
~
Isn't it funny that when the stock market increases, it gets far less play than if it drops?
~
If the market plunged by 500 points, it would have been major headlines.
~
People tend to whine about problems much more than count their blessings.

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Chasing Cain

If you want to get on the TV news, have a deer run through your home of business and get it on film.  The second most popular technique seems to be saying that Herman Cain made a pass at you.
~
Both methods are highly successful and good for a news story every week or so.
~
Both are also only possible due to the high levels of communication in this internet, information age.
~
Deer have been crashing into buildings for years, but surveillance cameras are relatively new.  And politicians have been trying to get laid for quite a while as well, but it has never been so widely reported.  
~
I don't care too much about the deer, but the politicians part has me perplexed.  If we rejected our leaders due to their sexual proclivities, we never would have had guys like John Kennedy, Martin Luther King, Franklin Roosevelt, Dwight Eisenhower, and Bill Clinton wielding positions of power.
~
Now if Herman Cain smashed through a store window chasing a deer..... that would be real news.

Monday, November 28, 2011

Out of the Haze

It was time to break out of the Thanksgiving Holiday Haze today, and I think I pulled it off.  The key was to touch all of the outstanding projects and get responses and inquiries out on everything.  Then the emails and phone calls kick in in response to your action and it is off to the races.
~
By 1:30 PM or so, it was like you never took a four day eating and drinking overindulgence binge with virturally no redeeming activity in between.
~
I even ate right today... keeping clear of carbs and getting 20 min. on the Cybex.
~
Made a Doctor's appointment for Jan 30, 2012 which is two days prior the end of the FreshAyer ordeal, and it seems like the two months between here and then might be nice period of time to get my weight and blood pressure down through a little self denial and discipline.
~
This time, the only thing that I can guarantee is that I'll try.

Saturday, November 26, 2011

Dump Etiquette

In a concerted effort to fend off the Thanksgiving Haze, I loaded up the the F150 for a much needed trip to the dump.,
~
The Marblehead Transfer Station, aka the Dump, is  a tight turnaround with a scale and a hydraulic packing unit that has a one car wide entrance.  In a perfect world, you would pull into the turnaround, neatly back up to the packing unit pit, efficiently dump your trash, and quickly drive away.
~
But at the Marblehead Dump... it's not a freaking perfect world.
~
It could be though, if people would only practice some simple dump etiquette. 
  • Like when you back up to the hydraulic pit, get out of your vehicle promptly and get to the business of dumping your crap.  
  • And you may want to move a little faster than a snail with the flu while you discard your trash from your vehicle. 
  • And you should refrain from striking up a neighborly conversation in between throwing your trash while other people, aka me, are waiting patiently to use the pit.
  • And when you're done dumping your shit, you really shouldn't stay at the pit to sweep your BMW station wagon clean and dust free while parked at the pit.
  • And when you're done taking up my time, while you primp and preen your dumping experience.... it would be nice if you moved your ass just a tad quicker to get back into your soccer mom bus and pull the hell out of the pit area.
Listen Asshole....
Your didn't lease some time at the freaking dump pit.  It's not like your timeshare in Cabo.   Get the Phuck In and get the Phuck Out and stop wasting my Phucking TIME!
~
I love to go to the Dump.  You meet the nicest people.... and they meet you.

Friday, November 25, 2011

Dysfunctional Family

I heard a comment made the other day about dysfunctional families.  Something about how she didn't know any family that wasn't dysfunctional in some way.
~
Peeps... I don't want to go all spiritual and metaphysical on you.... but I am 99.99% positive that we are not placed in this peculiar DNA arrangement on an isolated spinning planet to be "functional".  This existance is a challenge issued by the omnipotent Universal Force (aka God) to experience particular circumstances in the Earth medium. 
~
We don't experience the challenges by being "functional".
~
The "dysfunctional" part is the one thing that makes sense of it all.
~
So embrace your own version of "dysfunctional".   Everybody has it and yours is here for your own unique God given reasons for you to work on.   And above all, never be embarassed about your Dysfunctional Family.  Anybody who looks down on you are just trying to deny how phucked up that they, themselves, really are.
~
And BTW... if this doesn't fit into the constraints of traditional Christian, Jewish, Muslm, etc. faith... take a look at it.  Change the names to fit the boxes that you believe in, and you might end up agreeing with me.


Tuna Lips said...

That there is some deep shit yer shov'lin.

POTW Week 47

A slow day... the day after Thanksgiving.  Because we are so blessed, we had way too much to eat causing a sluggish, passifying, general feeling of inertia.  But we're  not going so slow that we can't live up to our responsibilities.
~
In many ways, this week is the most important of the year for practicing Nanepashemet Peeps.....  what with the inspirational yet annoying night before Bash with it's overindulgence, baudiness and lack of good taste all rolled into one raucous night of celebration.
~
I do enjoy it so.
~
ANNOUNCING....
Nanepashemet Peeps of the Week for the 47th week of 2011

Kerry D'Orio
Brendt D'Orio (Automatic Lagavulin Rule)
Maria Rowen (Automatic Lagavulin Rule)
Mark Vona (Automatic Lagavulin Rule)
Will Crawford
Brady Boyle

So another Bash goes into the record books.  It was the first at the Sundance House and won't be the last.  Next year, we welcome back the prodical son to this most solemn and esteemed occasion.





Thursday, November 24, 2011

Inspirational Automatic Action

I know that many of you are wondering about the Bash aftermath since there were no incidents that would induce a police report.
~
Suffice it to say that the Bash was a total, absolute, unequivocal success. 
~
How else would you describe it when three classy Peeps came forward with the ultimate token of appreciation... the gift of Lagavulin 16 year old Single Malt Scotch?
~
Since Tommy O had made the gesture a few days earlier, four bottles graced out countertop by the end of the evening.   Maria Rowen had made the initial gift, but since it was gift wrapped and presented in a nonpretentious fashion by leaving it on the counter, I didn't realize her gift until after she had left.   Thank you so much Maria.  You are certainly worthy of your Automatic Peep of the Week status.
~
Brendt D'Orio was next to show up graced with the King.  We also gave him his first glass and he had a nice response.   Then Mark Vona, coach/teacher/exceptional fisherman, walked in with an additional bottle of the King.  Pure class  shown by Brendt and Mark, and I will gratefully bestow your Automatic designation in the next few days. 
~
So we have completely restored our Lagavulin stock though the truly inspirational actions of Maria, Tommy, Mark and Brendt.
~
I am almost moved to tears.

Maria Rowen said...
Ah...Achieving the Automatic...Can a Peep ever portend to pretend that POTW is not the highest of all honors?...No...We all covet the consideration. So today let's give thanks to the King of Scotch, the MoaM and the Queen of last night's Culinary Cabaret...Joanne...November 23, 2011.



Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Final Bash Prep

Tommy O dropped by last night with the tent and two gallons of his brother's award winning Bobby Byrnes Clam Chowder.  We set up the 10' x 10' tent on the deck over the turkey fryer last night and it survived an inch of rain and some major wind gusts.
~
So this morning, I'm going to make the dough for the White Trash Balls, get to the Marblehead Post office to mail some certified public hearing notification letters, then over to the oral surgeon to extract that infected wisdom tooth.  On the way home from the Dentist, I'll pick up the ice and some firewood.
~
Then it will be limited activity until 5:30 PM when we fire up the turkey frier, cut the chicken wings, crack a beer and wait for you Peeps to show.
~
Soon the 2011 Night Before Thanksgiving Bash will be a hazy memory.

Jim L. said...

I'll check out the the Channel 7 news at 11. They usually have the spectacular stuff.

Homer Winslow - Dorys - circa 1880


  • Waterfront Offerings
  • Land Offerings
  • Tuesday, November 22, 2011

    Pulling Teeth

    A few weeks ago, I broke a crown in my lower left molar.   Not a big deal and I finally got to the dentist this morning.  One look in my mouth, and he uttered a large "WHOA!"
    ~
    Peeps... although you may know me as a Mountain of a Man, even guys like me can get a little unnerved when your dentist gasps at the first glance at your choppers.
    ~
    His prognosis????  Make an appointment with an oral surgeon and get your infected wisdom tooth extracted right away.... today if possible.  A call to the surgeon revealed that today wouldn't work, it would have to be tomorrow.
    ~
    Don't these guys know that the Bash is tomorrow???? Maybe the the most hallowed calendar event of the year for Nanepashemet Peeps of all persuasions?  There are things in life that are a bit more important than a freaking impacted wisdom tooth.   Who will fry the wings?  Who will make dough for the White Trash Balls?  I have to believe that yanking a tooth in the morning shouldn't impede these more important responsibilities.
    ~
    Once again.... I have to thank the Good Lord for blessing me with my superior Mountain of a Man abilities.  Go ahead and yank the tooth... and you might as well throw in a colonoscopy while you're at it.    It will take more than that to derail the 2011 Night Before Thanksgiving Bash.

    WTB Protection

    Can't say that this is a short work week because I got about a week's worth of work done yesterday in a highly productive 14 hours for Nanepashemet Telecom.
    ~
    Let's just say that if I blew off today and tomorrow before the Thanksgiving Holiday, I wouldn't be giving it a moment's notice.
    ~
    But we'll cover some details anyway during this pre-Bash period.   There is plenty of processing left due to all that productivity.
    ~
    After that, all attention must be to Bash prep.  The rain forecast is no problem, because Tommy O is coming by with at 10' x 10' tent which will fit nicely on the deck.  This is crucial because you can't let the White Trash Balls get wet and soggy.

    Saturday, November 19, 2011

    POTW Week 46

    As is often the case, I spoke too soon with my Lagavulin post yesterday as Tommy O showed why he is a worthly POTY and dropped by with a bottle of Lagavulin freshly picked from a New Hampshire liquor store.
    ~
    Was Tommy feeling a little guilty after putting my health in jeopardy by taking me to the Patriots game in Foxboro????
    ~
    Don't know and frankly don't care.
    ~
    As far as I'm concerned, he has totally redeemed himself and then some!!!!

    ANNOUNCING...
    Nanepashemet Peeps of the Week for the 46th Week of 2011.

    Jim Lundgren
    Tommy O' Shea (Automatic Lagavulin Gift Rule)
    Chris Roper
    Ben Martin
    Brian Donovan
    Bill Hillegas

    So now we have a bottle and a half of Lagavulin in stock as this year's night before Thanksgiving Bash draws near.

    Friday, November 18, 2011

    Leg Up on Lagavulin

    I walked up to Beacon Hill Liquors tonight, which is only 300 yards or so from my house, and bought a bottle of Lagavulin 16 Year Single Malt Scotch for myself.   My last bottle is stored on the WhaleEye and I didn't get to it in time before the boat was shrinkwrapped for the winter.   Probably reason enough to slit the shrinkwrap and retrieve it, but I resisted that urge.
    ~
    Joanne was surprized that I bought my own bottle since the night before Thanksgiving Bash is next week, and that's always been occasion for some of you exceptionally classy Peeps to be nominated as an Automatic Peep of the Week for bringing me a bottle of the King of Scotch.
    ~
    But I didn't want to take that for granted.
    ~
    Anyway....Peter Brown, owner of Beacon Hill Liquors, knows that I'll end up buying a decent supply of the Lagavulin that he stocks, and graciously cut the price by $5 bucks.
    ~
    So I poneyed up $65 bucks for my own bottle.
    ~
    Those of you who have been to Bashes of the past know that the Lagavulin starts to flow like wine as the event gathers steam and momentum.   This bottle can't last long... especially if I crack it tonight.



  • Waterfront Offerings
  • Land Offerings
  • Occupy Wherever

    I've been watching the news reports on the Occupy Boston campers who have set up their puptents somewhere in downtown Boston.
    ~
    Either the TV news reporters are seeking out the dumbest idiots that they can find to interview at the camp.... or these people are real losers.  All of the interviews have been with real goofy bastards and I havn't heard a shred of sense from any of them.
    ~
    Usually, the news reporters get a decent soundbite on these types of things.  No luck here.
    ~
    Yet people like Obama, Nancy Pelosi and that Harvard Professor running against Senator Brown have expressed their support for the movement.   What movement?   Who the hell are they supporting?   People who pitch puptents and yelp about getting a job?
    ~
    I, myself, wouldn't have the means to camp out in downtown Boston for a couple of months.  Who would pay for my food, mortgages and all of the other stuff?  Man, I'd love to sit around and whine and scream with these fine looking folks, but I'm too busy thinking of ways to make money and keep afloat.

    Thursday, November 17, 2011

    Banging Bush

    I like a little political debate from time to time....as long as it is honest and not burdened by mindless ideology.
    ~
    And I like it when people discuss issues on their own merits.  Why is a leader correct?  Not... well, at least he's way better than someone else.
    ~
    So it really bugs me that Liberals and Democrats often leave the debate and start on a vitriolic diatribe against Bush and Cheney.  I get turned off by that fall back approach... and I think that this argument is inherently weak.
    ~
    George W. Bush, like Harry Truman who was vilified in office, will go down in history as an exceptional President who defused the international terrorist threat, and protected the West from mindless attacks.
    ~
    How many lives did he save by pining the Radical Muslim movement in spider holes in Iraq and Afghanistan?
    ~
    Countless. 
    ~
    And I don't have to support Bush by downgrading Clinton or Obama, but it's sad when the Clintonites and Obamanistas can only get their point across by banging Bush.

    dougmaxfield said...

    delightful.

    Jim L. said...

    Sorry, I can't see history being kind to this dweeb. He lied to get us into Iraq to find phantom WMD's. He diverted forces from the real objective - Bin Laden. And, he did a whole lot towrds putting the economy in the mess it is in. But, your right, we should forgive and forget.

    MJNEST said...
    Who wouldnt want to bang that handsome devil...








    Wednesday, November 16, 2011

    Job Commute

    It's back to New Haven this morning... building a site then attending a zoning meeting in the evening.   It will take a lot of Red Bull to get me home late tonight.

    Tuesday, November 15, 2011

    White Trash Balls - Disclosed

    Persistent Peeps have been posing questions about my Thanksgiving Bash White Trash Balls recipe. 
    ~
    Normally I would shrug these types of requests away as just another of the hundreds of incursions that I receive everyday from Peeps who want some shred of recognition from the Mountain of a Man.
    ~
    But these requests are so diverse and widespread... from people like Superpeep Brian Butler, Ruthie Bollen from the old Neighborhood, and Kelly Light of Upstate New York Site Aquisition fame.... that I can't just brush them off as if they were regular rank and file common irritants.
    ~
    As I find myself weakened and compromised, I hereby disclose the coveted Nanepashemet recipe for.....
    WHITE TRASH BALLS.
    ~
    Please follow this recipe closely... step by step... or don't even try it at all.  WTB's are serious Bash party food.
    ~
    Begin by washing your hands thoroughly.  Really get under the fingernails, and then don't go scratching anything before you start cooking.
    ~
    Using a Cuisinart Food Processor, add three cups of white flour to the mixing bowl.  I prefer bleached white flour like Pillsbury which has been so processed that a nutrient wouldn't  stand a chance to be found.  We're talking WTB's here.... not freaking health food.
    ~
    Next add a teaspoon of salt to the flour, followed by three quarters of a stick of salted butter.  Make sure it is salted because the unsalted butter doesn't taste as good, and it you are going to clog up your arterys with butter, it might as well be the good tasting stuff.
    ~
    Put the lid on the Cuisinart bowl and pulse the dry mixture a few times.  If you leave the lid off, you will have flour all over the freaking kitchen, so that is an important step.   I always feel bad when I forget to do this, and then Joanne has all that clean up to do.
    ~
    Take a coffee mug and fill it with ice cubes, then fill to the brim with cold water.
    ~
    In another coffee cup, place a packet of self rising yeast in and fill half way with luke warm water.  The water should be just warm to the touch.   Then add a tablespoon of white or brown sugar.  Stir with a spoon and set this mixture aside.   The yeast will come to life with the water and start feeding on the sugar.  In about three minutes, a foam will form on the top of this mixture.   I guess you could say the this is the climax of a young yeast life.
    ~
    If you're done with that mental picture, take the coffee cup with the ice cubes and pour the water into the cup with the yeast mixture, using your fingers to strain the ice.  Now aren't you glad you didn't scratch yourself?
    ~
    Start pulsing the dry flour mixture and  slowly pour the combined liquid slowing into the open tube on the Cuisinart cover.  This dribble should take about a minute.   Then contine to pulse the flour and the liquid for a minute or so until it transforms into dough and pulls away from the sides of the Cuisinart bowl.
    ~
    Take this dough ball out, but it into a mixing bowl and cover the bowl with cellphane wrap that you have sprayed with Pam non- stick spray.
    ~
    For the Bash, I repeat this about three times and put all of the dough into the freezer until the morning of the Bash.   Then take the dough out and let it rise.
    ~
    Fill a turkey fryer or lobster kettle with peanut oil about a third of the height of the pot.
    ~
    I use the turkey fryer but you can use your stove to get the oil heated to 375 degrees.   This is important so use a thermometer..  If it is less, the balls will be greasy, and if it is hotter, the balls will be burnt.   There is nothing worse than greasy balls.... or burnt balls.
    ~
    Now is where the importance of clean hands comes in.  Pick small pieces of the dough, work it into small balls and carefully place in the 375 degree oil.  If the balls are too big, they will expand and be undercooked in the middle.   A freaking gross white trash ball.
    ~
    Let the balls brown nicely on one side... about three minutes, then turn them and let them finish browning for another two minutes or so.   I use gloves because the oil tends to splatter, then hurts like hell on your hands and forearms.
    ~
    When they are a nice golden color, remove them and place in a bowl with paper towers, drizzle with powdered sugar or sugar and cinnamon.
    ~
    I've found that the Peeps at the Bash seem to enjoy their White Trash Balls more after six beers or so.
    ~
    My lawyers advised me to deny this recipe to you, but I'm pretty judgement proof after all of the legal fees I've paid them, so I figure.... what the hell.  If you want to sue me... get in line.
    ~
    And don't eat too many White Trash Balls in one sitting.

    Geary C said...

    Sounds like you are very confident in the quality and purpose of our balls.


    Monday, November 14, 2011

    A Sprayed Finish

    If I told you how much I have paid for paint sprayers over the years... I'm sure you would lose respect for me.... given there is any left.
    ~
    I'm not going to tell you all the money I've dropped on these machines, because Joanne occasionally reads this pathetic Blog and I don't want her to know.   But I'll tell you this much.  It was a freaking whole lot.
    ~
    I've been a fan of spraypainters ever since I was the Executive Director of the Lynn Housing Authority, bought a sprayer, and found out that you could spray out an apartment in two days... compared to the 10+ days that it was then taking.  So I fired one of the painters and named the paint sprayer after him.  And then threatened to fire more and name more sprayers unless production tightened up.... which it did.
    ~
    Course the unions and the politicians jumped all over me for this brash act.... but now I'm veering off topic.
    ~
    The fact is... I hate to freaking paint. But the boats and the furniture that I like to build requires a great finish or its not worth the time building that stuff.  And to get the best finish, you really have to spray multi light coats.  Plus spray painting is way faster.  So I've suffered along with unpredictable HVLP sprayers until now.
    ~
    Went to Harbor Freight, and saw an automotive High Volume Low Pressure (HVLP) spray paint gun that worked off of 35 PSI on the compressor.  And it was only $49 Bucks.  So I took a flyer and bought yet another sprayer.
    ~
    But the freaking thing works like a charm.  Just sprayed the second coat of unthinned Minwax Satin Polyurethane on the bookcases that I built to hide the elevator door at the Sundance house, and it was the best spraying experience that I have ever experienced.
    ~
    No drips or leaks from the gun, a fine and predictable spray, and a smooth and even finish.  A nice purchase from Harbor Freight Tools.

    Saturday, November 12, 2011

    Joe Pa and Pedophilia

    I've been trying to sort out this Penn State pedophilia situation for a while.
    ~
    Consider Joe Paterno.  He coaches a major college football team for 46 years until he is 84 years old.   His heir apparent, Jerry Sandusky is deposed in 1999, at the prime of his coaching life, age 55 with allegations of child abuse.   Yet he forms a program for disadvantaged youth, with a ready supply of pedophilia victims and uses the football facilities of the Penn State Campus!
    ~
    Paterno controls every facet of the program and just won't retire.  Could it be that he knew of the timebomb and wanted to control as much as he could for as long as he could?
    ~
    Consider pedophilia.  A grown man despicably sodomizes a young boy, causing a lifetime of psychological harm.... all for the momentary release of the Perv.  Sandusky should be hanged by his nuts.
    ~
    Like 90% of you Peeps, I'm a practicing heterosexual.   But just because I have heterosexual urges, I don't seek out little girls to rape.  That is immoral and criminal.  Why can't  these Pedophiles control their urges as well?
    ~
    String up the asshole.  And string up anyone who gave him the open environment to fuck with innocent kids.

    dougmaxfield said...

    String up anyone who caught him in the act and didn't beat him to death.






    Friday, November 11, 2011

    BYC Bound

    We're getting ready to head over to the Boston Yacht Club for dinner with Dale and Gail Johnson.
    ~
    For you peeps outside of the area, the BYC is on Front Street in Old Town Marblehead on the Harbor.... not in Boston for whatever heritage clad reason.
    ~
    It's about time that we horrified the Yankees... plus my bill from the summer is paid in full so nobody will be dunning me while I'm ordering my VO and Cranberry.
    ~
    Actually, we've never received any snooty attitudes from the people at the BYC.  Always very cordial and friendly.  Course, I'm usually loading up on beer and cocktails when we're down there, so maybe I can't really tell.
    ~
    But I really don't think we aggravate our fellow Clubbers too much.  And the food and the wait staff are top rate.

    Perry Brain Fart

    I feel bad for the  brain fart exhibited by Gov. Rick Perry in the Presidential Debate.
    ~
    Been there, Done that.
    ~
    It has happened to me in public speaking situations where you split into two consciousnesses.  One is trying to speak to topic and no facts are forthcoming... and the other is watching you go though this and realizing that you are totally screwed.
    ~
    One time I was able to recover by just saying that I was nervous and needed time to compose myself.  The audience was surprizingly accommodating, and when I came to my senses, I actually gave a pretty good presentation.
    ~
    For the most part, I have overcome my phobia of public speaking and generally do a good job.... even an inspirational one from time to time.  Once my boss at General Dyanimics said that I gave the best presentation that he ever saw at a national account pitch in Chicago.  Funny because I wasn't that impressed.  Course he turned out to be a real dildo anyway.  We won the job and he ultimately screwed it up.  Corporate Doublespeak Wunderkind.
    ~
    But... to get back on topic... The insidious part of a brainfart is that you never know when it will attack.  
    ~
    I probably won't be throwing the Nanepashemet Presidential endorsement to Perry.   But his brainfart has nothing to do with it.

    Thursday, November 10, 2011

    Corroborating Evidence

    OK.... I'm sure a decent amount of you secretly thought that I sounded like a pussy complaining about the Patriots game last Sunday.
    ~
    Well, just so you know... this Mountain of a Man is no FREAKING PUSSY!
    ~
    As it turns out, Jimmy O'Shea got himself checked out by a physician, and the outcome was that he  suffered a concussion from the moron who landed on his head while I was sitting right next to him.  I thought Jimmy looked kind of out of it... now I know that he really was.

    TommyO said...

    I have been going to games for almost twenty years. This was the worst experience ever. From the moment we left the tailgate to go to the stadium, there were long lines, pushing and shoving, obnoxious people, drunken morons, classless chuckleheads with no sense of common courtesy. the game sucked, the traffic was brutal. Unless it is a playoff game I am going to pass on going to any game unless it is Sunday at ONE. I am glad the M of a M was there with my bro''s so it wasn't a total waste of 12 hours of my life!

    Lucky Numbers

    Tomorrow is November 11, 2011.  11/11/11.
    ~
    It's no big deal.  Has to do when somebody set up the calendar, two thousand skaty-eight years ago or so.
    ~
    There's a whole big thing about names and numbers, and while no logic is behind it, a lot of people, including your own Mountain of a Man, pays attention to it.
    ~
    When my son Mike was born, we had already picked out the name Kevin to name him.  But I had a weird feeling at the last minute and we ended up naming him Michael.  Course he turned out pretty good, so maybe it was the right move.  No way to say.
    ~
    And for a decent amount of time, I used to wake up and the digital clock would be all ones with 11:11 PM or 1:11 AM.  This happened night after night, and I always would say a little prayer of thanks to God for all of my blessings and would ask for certain things that I won't be disclosing to you now.
    ~
    What would make me wake up at that time and check the clock night after night??? I don't know either.  Freaking Creepy.
    ~
    But tomorrow, when I look at the calendar, I'll probably say a little prayer.  Can't hurt.

    Blog Rank

    As of February 2011 there were over 156 million public blogs in existence.
    ~
    Your very own Nanepashemet Blog is ranked 18,421 by Wikio.
    ~
    That puts us in the top 1%.
    ~
    Which most people would be satisfied with.... but not here. We won't rest until we are ranked #1 with all the money, power and prestige that it entails.
    ~
    As it is... we have plenty of power and prestige. Still working on the money part though.

    Wednesday, November 09, 2011

    Stepping Down

    Peeps... I don't mean to disappoint you.... but you won't see me ever running for political office... now or forever.
    ~
    Can you imagine the lines of losers who would be accusing me of all types of harassment and assault?   They would have to install turnstiles and use card readers to process them all.
    ~
    First of all, let me categorically deny each and every bogus claim that they make.... before they make them.
    ~
    I didn't do it... I swear.   And even if I did... I don't remember it.  
    ~
    There is a vast conspiracy to sabotage my candidacy and to downgrade my status as a legitimate living Mountain of a Man legend.
    ~
    So to pre-empt all of the lies, innuendoes, and finger pointing.... I'll just end my candidacy before it even starts.
    ~
    Sometimes being a Mountain of a Man means that you sidestep landing on shit before everything begins to stink.